Trading Places

Okay thats it. Why did I choose to work here?

I thought I would start abruptly for a change...........

So, this animation lark. Sticking with it. It is my only goal. I have a week off in June to nail it. 9 days to sit there in front of my screens and learn. Get outta 'ere.

It is the only goal at the moment. Enough is enough. Right now its techno/electro music, a spot of doodling that gets me through the day. If I dont acheive in animation, I have nothing else to turn to, that is why it "MUST" happen...........

I will fight till the bitter end to "entertain" a new industry.

I Am Who I Am

I cant sleep, I cant eat. I am so frustrated, angry and generally annoyed.

Something happened on Monday I did not expect. The backstabbing bull that goes on just amazes me. You help, you advise and you do your best and for what, nothing.

Some part of me says revenge, an interesting word. Comprising of seven letters, seven sins. Another part says let it go, but I can not.

I cant help that my personality says, I get emotional charged, you deal with it and move on. But this is out of the normal. I don’t want to let it go. I want pure revenge, I want someone to feel so sick that they will never cross me again. My heart is on my sleeve, that’s me.

I know I would feel guilty for doing it but the blatant disregard tuned with my anger I just want to let it all go. My options are limited, I could jack it all in and say “sod it” why should I bother. I don’t want to work with people with a complete disregard or understanding of what I am trying to do.

In the current climate that is difficult. In the other hand I could use it as a catalyst to accelerate my plans to get out of here. That is what I normally do and is usually a foundation for me to push things forward.

I need time, I need to release some of these feelings that are just ready to explode. I know I have got to snap out of it before I do something stupid but at the moment I just……..

I say this from the heart because I am who I am.

Escape

Well it is going well.

I have been through the first 8 videos/tutorials on my course. I am finding it very easy to pickup. On a few occasions I have had to pause/edit and carry on but I am lucky with my PC setup to do that.

I decided to switch away from the texturing course and choose animation. I noticed the texturing was mainly photoshop, which I know how to use but I want to learn more about rigging and core animation skills. Texturing just not my thing. Glad I decided to make the change now before I paid for the course!

I have done my first animation of a toy car, next the bouncing ball, then the solar system.

Been A Long Time Coming

Well I have been saving money and next month I have enough to start my first course online with Escape Studios, London. http://www.escapestudios.com/en_GB/home.html

I have been away for a month dithering in and out of Maya and Zbrush contemplating what to do. I have been going back to watch films like Transformers, Lord of the Rings to get some much needed inspiration. Once again, I have updated my deviantart page and I hope the start with next months texturing course points me in the right direction.

http://iank240.deviantart.com/art/iank240-March09-Rodorix-115926484

Ian out :)

Faffing

A had a very good conversation with a friend who has really put things into perspective for me.

I could see raindrops on my window, but I could not see through the window clearly...

So faffing, yes, my word of the week. And less of it.

Level design, level design, level design. I know now to use Maya, now make something susbstantial. An interesting point and a point taken. So the Black Pearl? Nah too much detail, start small. Ooo, an old english tavern, now that is something that could be interesting...

Help

I am finding life a little difficult at the moment.

I am going against what I normally do. Usually very open, happy to help. I did not realize how difficult it was to switch the other way. Yes I am focused on what I want, but personally, it feels like a lot of hard work.

Itching to help, but I have to stop myself doing it.

Slow Progress

As the title suggests. Slow progress.

I am still seething inside but now I have some direction. Sometimes it just takes time. Bit I am still not letting up. My plan is gaining momentum. I say to myself "stick to the plan" let the rage flow...

I have no other way of dealing with what I have. If I let up, the pieces unfold like a rose. But the bud is still young. Shame the stem was pointing into the ground for a while. I want the flower to unfold how I want it, with a little help by nature...........

On a happier note, with Harri we created a Rhino out of the snow. Share the love.

Pleasure In Speaking

Do you know what, fk it.

I dont care if I seem passionate, angry, without compassion or even without seeing the bigger picture, but fk with me and I dont go lying down.

In fact, I am taking this opportunity as a catalyst (as always) to just tweak my intentions to larger goals. I maybe a bit arrogant to say I have no limitations, whatever I do, I will have a go and use what I got. All that I have.

But I aint always going to be able to everything at the same time, give someone a little direction and great things could happen. For all those that know what has happened, then I know what will happen. I tried the politically correct route, now I am going to the top of the chain and working down.

People may get a little upset, I may push the wrong buttons but I cant keep everyone happy.

Multitasking Monkey no longer wants to be a monkey.

Felt Like Posting Something

The last girl and the last reason to make this last for as long as I could

First kiss and the first time that I felt connected to anything

The weight of water, the way you told me to look past everything I had ever learned

The final word in the final sentence you ever uttered to me was love

Just Bring It

I has been busy :)

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=Scwnsgij0oo
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=SaML4KLkyd0
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=NfuVYjKNMxM
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=uo_zjARE5bk

So now its all about game mechanics and UV mapping, (texturing).

Game Mechanics:

Mind
Focus
Wisdom

Body
Agility
Precision

Spirit
Essence
Balance

The game mechanics will work like this.

For instance, punched in the shoulder, the first time it hurts a little (Body). Hit in the same place, the arm goes dead, (body). The (mind) cant focus on just fighting the opponent as the body is hurt trying to defend itself (mind/spirit) and attacking at the same time. The shoulder gets hit a few more times, now the arm/shoulder is broken, the (body) is damaged, the (mind) is split and the (spirit) is broken.

So three different attributes split. As the body takes damage the health bar (for the purpose and ease of talking about it) goes down, but regenerates over time. The Mind and spirit much the same. The spirit suffers when it is overwhelmed. My plan is to build modifiers around the attributes in bold. It is a more in depth game mechanic but has it rewards.

My problem is dealing with death. Do I only take it as far as incapacitated only and the avatar can never die? Hmm, something to think about.

If I am boring you, well, erm...
Your sarcasm is not welcome here ..... Move Along :)